Monday, December 12, 2011

Mumbling

maybe chocolate can reduce my tense, and i got this for FREE. tq to i dont know who, may Allah bless.

Assalamualaikum!

Its been a while I know. Hello ladies, how are you? Last night was the day where everybody was not sooo very nice to me. I have to write as polite as possible, only Allah knows, burning and tears inside. When I am under pressure, I love talk to people and always hope they can understand but at the end they are the one who make additional pressure. And I just could not blame them for it. :(. I feel like yeah I just should keep quite, make myself isolated from everybody so that I am not getting so much hurt which I know I could not receive any. How can I want to smile and I don't want to fake being happy in front of people when the truth is I am not. There is no way to explain to someone who does not already understand. If i could want anything in this world, I wanted to be alone and happy.I hope this feeling will pass soon and hence I will be able to be myself again, but until then, all I can do is just wait.

It always be days where you wake up in the morning and things are not the way you hoped it would be. I dream for a husband beside me, lame joke. That is when I keep telling myself that things will get better.Hey life is not about happiness, life is about problem too. There are times when people disappoint you, be they anyone. There will always be a challenges to face and changes to be made in your life, and I know it is all up to me whether to accept it. I try to constantly keep myself headed in the right direction, it may not be easy at times, but deep inside I know in those times of struggle, I will get paid back and sometimes who knows might found a stronger sense of mine.:(

Sometimes I am scared to get close to people. Be they are friends, strangers, families or whatever. It seems that every time I get close to them or someone, they always have to go away.:(. My kids brain always thought that why life always be unfair to me, am i that bad. Can you just leave me with people I love. Maybe it is to teach me how life goes on and how i should not depend on others like so much. I found out, the more I depend, the more I seek for help, the more I will get frustrated. How I wish I can do all by my own. I wish. We just don't know what level of sincerity do people have in helping you. They might say yes, so that you did not get hurt, but deep inside, we just do not know. Hey remember, people can hide their true feelings, very well. Or maybe I always trust the wrong people, I don't know. But dear, please do remember the only partner that deserves you is the one that thinks he/she does not, the one that will stay by your side no matter how much you make shit, how much you fuck up, how much you blame him/her, and the one who will forgive you mistake after mistake.

 Why it is so easy to write blog post but it takes one day just to think what I am going to write a law assignment, idea please come in.


READING THIS POST IS LIKE WASTING YOUR PRECIOUS TIME
 

9 comments:

Unknown said...

untunglaa dapat coklat free,hehe..mintak sikit =)

BxRxD said...

My Wise Bro penah cakap.."Uzir,Manusia takkan jadi sebagaimana yang kite nak...xkan Uzir xkan..Hanya di tangan Allah SWT Yang Maha Berkuasa,Yang Menguasai Masa Hadapan, Yang Menguasai Hati hati manusia..Hanya Dia sahaja yang boleh mengubahnya dan menentukannya...Kalo kau ndak mengharapkan sesuatu daripada manusia,Doa kepada Allah supaya kau tidak bergantung kpd manusia tersebut...ttapi untuk menjadikan manusia tersebut sbagai asbab Allah mmemakbulkan harapan kau itu..dan yang paling penting,major or must do!!! Bertawakal diatas KetentuanNya,kerana itu yang Allah nak tengok..yang Kau bley tak terima ketentuanNya.Amal,Doa dan Tawakal..erm..Uzir..lets go mamak, have some teh tarik..haha!!!"

Nafisya Ismail said...

hai si cantik! suke tgk kamu. comel sgt la..

Anonymous said...

:)

Anonymous said...

Kamu ni dalam kembara seorang insan.You will find it.InsyAllah

Anonymous said...

Manusia itu tidak tahu akan nasibnya juga tidak tahu jodohnya kerana itu adalah rahsia Allah.Sekiranya kita gagal dalam menemui sesuatu,jangan la putus asa.Bagi pendapat saya itu semua sebahagian drpada kehidupan.salah dahulu baru tahu..bila dh tahu barulah kita boleh menilai yg mana intan dan yg mana permata.saya juga hadapi masalah yg sama,dugaan sepanjang zaman,hahaha.Tetapi insyAllah setiap dugaan akan jadi bekalan utk saya;).Bella belajarlah untuk mempercayai orang,biarlah kalo ditipu..lambat laun bella tahu yg mana satu penipu dan mana satu yg ikhlas.Bagi pendapat saya,kalo kita tidak belajar utk mempercayai manusia..masakan kita mau belajar mempercayai Tuhan??.Hubungan antara kita dan tahu tiada bezanya,sentiasa bersatu tubuh Tuhan itu batin dan kita ini Zahir,mestilah seiring dan sejalan..;)...ok,hopefully Bella dlm keadaan stabil."Pandang aatu kepada semua,Pandang semua kepada satu"wassalam..

bella dela rosa said...

tq semua atas pandangan.;)

Anonymous said...

Tertarik dgn ferrero rocher itu!
Chocolate is always be my remedy too (:

syafique liverres said...

u r so beautiful wearing hijab....tahniah...:)